Addiction, Depression, Anger, Frustration — this is the cycle that has taken my mind into the most automatonic sequence that I have ever encountered in life this far.\u00c2 I am capable of recognising this in the past and I am actually cogniscent at any given time of what the “prudent” and “wise” course of action is. Unfortunately the upshot of the knowledge does not translate to the desire to behave in this “better” way. Or to put it\u00c2 another way — knowing that shutting up and putting\u00c2 up is the most highly rewarded path — i\u00c2 still feel justified in being angry as fuck and will (can?)\u00c2 not supress it —\u00c2 As a result I am fixated on revenge and the repayment of pain with interest and on this path I am a master craftsmen at his desk.\u00c2 <\/p>\n
\u00c2 I feel that the level of detachment that is demanded by so many philosophical schools of thought is a mechanism whereby I can get\u00c2 out of\u00c2 the cycle, however, when there have been times that i have successfully cultivated detachment to this level I have not been able to recognise myself and the judgement I make on myself when so acting is harsh!.\u00c2 <\/p>\n
So with identity closely linked to engagement and reactivity and the result of this being a cycle of damaging and maliflous behaviour that are in effect robbing me of the happiness that I am striving for I have to make a decision.\u00c2 A less engaged and safer mind state\u00c2 or the unrelenting and more justified extension of my current path and the damage that will cause to myself.\u00c2 huh — no choice!<\/p>\n
\u00c2 Any tips for coming to peace with powerlessness?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Addiction, Depression, Anger, Frustration — this is the cycle that has taken my mind into the most automatonic sequence that I have ever encountered in life this far.\u00c2 I am capable of recognising this in the past and I am actually cogniscent at any given time of what the “prudent” and “wise” course of action […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":8,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.filthmedia.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.filthmedia.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.filthmedia.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.filthmedia.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/8"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.filthmedia.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=18"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.filthmedia.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.filthmedia.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=18"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.filthmedia.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=18"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.filthmedia.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=18"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}